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Captain Knottwit - At last, some intelligence

13th May 2009

MIGGLY MOOS SPORTS EVENINGS 2009

EVENT 3 – ORIENTEERING WITH THE MOOS

Here is the un-biased abridged opinion of Captain Knottwit:-

FECKING AWESOME 3

SUMMARY
Most suited person to win the event – ENZO
Who almost caused the call out of Search and Rescue – ENZO
Ranulph Fiennes Award – ENZO
One of the Moos logged 18 miles on his trip computer – was it Enzo ??
Dick of the Day – ROG (see below)
Dick of the Day 2 – KNOTTWIT
Least observant Riders of the Day – Option, Berni and Jimmy Mac (Captain)
Most cruel Riders of the Day - Option, Berni and Jimmy Mac (Scrippsy)
Quote of the Day – Jock – “I’m loving it, riding on my own with a map in my hand and without that tw*t Crock wittering in my ear”

Well this was what I heard.

ENZO

MOUNTAIN

FOG

11.35PM

Pre-event nerves were clearly in the air as much communication was apparently the order of the evening before the event as all entrants busily planned their co-ordinates and their routes and checked their workings with their fellow riders. Rog had to be the embarrassment of the day as he failed to grasp an understanding of an OS Map calmly admitting that the only paper he ever saw in his hands were £50 notes. This resulted embarrassingly in the Captain having to explain to the Millionaires daughter how to read said map. The said communications were extended to the mobile answerphone of the Captain where an un-named Moo was heard to say “there are serious errors in the event planning”. That could be said as the retrieved Garmin GPS co-ordinates were wrongly logged in reverse order. THAT’S HOW THEY WERE LOGGED BY THE GARMIN !!. Complaints on a postcard to Garmin please.

Enzo was the talk of the night as thank God he finally made it back to the TA at 11.35pm after riding double the distance of everyone else after losing himself on familiar territory – an OS Map. In all fairness Moos spirit shone through as he was adamant to make the finish. Thanks to Tom and John for searching for the lad. As Captain Mainwaring once said. “You stupid boy”. A new name then perhaps for Enzo – PIKE ???

 

Ramblings of MP like cheating was once rife again as entrants shuffled routes to their own ends. Inevitably “grouping” occurred as usual and this was again reflected in the results. Little bOBEep was an inspiration to many others as his little sheep (6/7 in all – Slug, Johnsy, Pealy and can’t remember who else followed him up to Rudry Common having literally taken a 90 deg right turn at the Checkpoint at the beech tree having failed to see the marker board. Slug eventually saw the light before an unnecessary climb was halted to the Common and who knows where.

Dastardly and Mutley (Gaz and the sneaky Harty) had to be the villains of the piece as they tried to put off Owgie and his drinking buddies (Wrighty and Boy, Knobhead) from visiting Checkpoint 4 in order to benefit their own causes. The funny thing was that the Wacky Races crew almost got lost themselves in the mirky fog on top of Machen Mountain later on in the event.

Schlong again decided that self was best finishing the event before all others and confessing not to have passed anybody on the night. Top marks to the hermit for the highest score on the night – I wouldn’t yet rule him out from a top three finish !!

As usual little encouragement was needed to scrutinise the aforementioned proceedings aided by the consumption of the obligatory gallon of ale!!!

So onward it is to Event 4 (hopefully something new) and then 5 – THE DECIDER which as Captain I plan to sit back and let Tom take the lead. If what he is planning comes off it will be full of laughs.

RESULTS OF EVENT 3

POSITION
ENTRANT
EVENT POINTS
BONUS POINTS
TOTAL POINTS
1
SCHLONG
18
10
28
1
GAZ
17
N/A
17
2
RUSS
17
N/A

17

2
DICKIE
17
0
17
2
HARTY
17
0
17
2
CROCK
17
N/A
17
2
PEALY
17
N/A
17
3
ADE
16
10
26
3
WRIGHTY
16
10
26
3
OPTION
16
N/A
16
3
PELLET
16
N/A
16
3
JOHNSY
16
N/A
16
3
MARTY
16
N/A
16
3
REG
16
N/A
16
3
SLUG
16
N/A
16
4
BAG OF LEAVES
15
0
15
4
BERNAARD
15
10
25
4
OBE
15
10
25
4
JIMMY MAC
15
N/A
15
5
OWGIE
13
N/A
13
5
ENZO
13
N/A
13
6
JOCK
10
N/A
10
Non Riders - ROG, BEAKER, BUDGIE, GYPO, CHRISSIE, DAF

OVERALL STANDINGS AFTER EVENT 3

POSITION
ENTRANT
TOTAL POINTS
1
OPTION
46
2
SLUG
45
JOHNSY
45
3
PELLET
43
RUSS
43
4
GAZ
42
PEALY
42
5
CROCK
41
6
REG
40
JIMMY MAC
40
7
JOCK
38
ENZO
38
8
OWGIE
36
9
SCHLONG
31
10
BERNI
30
11
TONY
29
12
KEV
28
BEAKER
28
OBE
28
13
ADE

27

 
WRIGHTY

27

14
MARTY

25

15
DAI EYE

24

16
DICKIE

22

17
HARTY

21

18
BAG OF LEAVES

15

19
DAF

13

20
ROG

4

WHO’S GOING TO WIN THE £100:00+ NOW THAT ANOTHER EVENT IS LIKELY TO BE RUN ??

My money is on Johnsy for a win

Wooden Spoon – Rog – being engraved as we speak

Spirit of the Series – ENZO ????

Thanks for participating

Captain Knottwit, Vice and the old fella

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