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Captain Knottwit - At last, some intelligence

25th February 2009

CAPTAINS RIDE REPORT -25 FEBRUARY 2009

MIGGLY MOOS SPORTS EVENINGS 2009

EVENT 1 – CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW’S TREASURE HUNT

Here is the un-biased abridged opinion of Captain Knottwit:-

FECKING AWESOME

Twas a tale of two halves – the Captain trying to get the route sorted out in time and the remaining Moos having to endure the bloody thing and in the available time. It almost went wrong on two counts when a heated discussion with a local Farmer at the Ridgeway prior to the start threatened it all and an Ash Wednesday Church Service during the event could have also fecked it into touch. In any event luck was on our side and we made it. Big Thanks to Tom and Scripsy for their help – Tom for providing the much needed whisky and Scripsy – the newly appointed Locum Vicar. Good job he wasn’t mistaken for the Vicar!!

The best part despite the length of the event was that all Moos were determined to finish and this provided a close finish (as the event was designed to do) and keep the competition on a high for the forthcoming events. Here are the results to keep you Statisticians happy :-

RESULTS

POSITION
ENTRANT
OVERALL TIME
CHURCH TO RUDRY COMMON TIME
CORRECT QUESTION COUNT
BONUS POINTS
TOTAL POINTS
1
SLUG
2:20:10
11:10
27
2
29
2
BEAKER
1:3320
9:40
24
4
28
3
PELLET
2:20:10
12:22
27
27
4
JOHNSY
2:38:25
13:29
26
26
4
OPTION
2:03:00
16:07
26
26
5
GAZ
1:37:20
9:46
25
25
5
MARTY
1:54:10
11:21
25
25
6
TONY
2:01:00
11:01
24
24
6
REG
2:52:25
11:46
24
24
6
JOCK
2:21:40
12:20
24
24
7
JIMMY MAC
1:58:30
10:20
23
23
7
CROCK
2:00:00
10:20
23
23
7
OWGIE
1:55:30
10:32
23
23
7
KEV PLANE
2:28:55
11:10
23
23
7
DAI EYE
2:10:00
11:15
23
23
7
PEALY
2:09:15
11:22
23
23
7
ENZO

2:38:25

12:33
23

23
7
RUSS
2:22:10
12:50
23
23
8
DAF
2:06:25
12:09
11
11


Did not finish riders: DICKIE (Missed Church), HARTY (Not used to new bike)
, SCHLONG (Faked mechanical), O.B.E. (Unfit)

Non-Riders: BERNI (Nappy changing), CHRISSIE (Too scared to ride unfit), ADE, GYPO, BUDGIE, FARQUAR (Gay), WRIGHTY

If you all want to know the correct answers to the Questions then the captain will pleased to advise !!!

 

Unfortunately the Captain, Tom and Scripsy didn’t get to see much of the event however these were some of the comments we heard or stumbled across.

Scripsy – pissed off cos the lights were on in the Church. His plan was to scare all Moos shitless as they entered the Churchyard.

Jimmy Mac and Dai Eye – didn’t quite get the numbered arrows and the VIA instructions on some early Questions, but the penny eventually dropped.

Some Moos (the dull buggers) – got confused by Question 18 (Bananas) on the way up the Fire road to the Ridgeway. The question was planted on the opposite side of the Tree for obvious reasons.

Dickie – Takes Twat of The Ride as he got it all completely wrong.

Harty – Takes Devious Tw*t of the Ride as he was caught lurking about the Maenllwyd hoping he would not get spotted by the Captain especially after he deliberately cut the route in a poor attempt to win.

Owgie – Takes the rotten scoundrel award as he rung the Captain mid-event to seek clarification of the route, as he implied somebody nicked the arrows – funny as he was the only one making false statements.

OBE – seen disappearing into the night and not again that evening – some say he was knackered.

Slug and Lettuce – definitely joined at the hip – seemed to get everything exactly the same. Good effort though as speed doesn’t always pay off as it shows.

 

Congratulations to Slug on a calculated win. Congratulations also to Beaker for winning the timed aspect and to Gaz for coming a close second (time-wise)

Don’t spend your prize money yet Chaps as there could be a nasty sting in the tail !!!!!

Good effort made by all

Here’s looking forward to the Next Event

Sorry it’s a bit short – over did it last week !!!

Your’s aye

Captain Jack

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